In the Name... This morning's Gospel reminds me of a scene in the TV series "Keeping Up Appearances." When Hyacinth says to her hen-pecked, long-suffering, husband Richard that she looks forward to spending all eternity with him in heaven, Richard looks upwards in a silent plea that it might not be so. "Whose wife will the woman be?" Isn't that a great question? It's like those questions with which we used to torment our Sunday School teachers when we were kids - you reme

Sermon: PENTECOST 20, October 27th, 2019 In the Name… A pastor's little boy was watching him work on a sermon at the computer and asked, "Daddy. How do you know what to write?" The pastor smiled and replied, "God tells me." "Oh.", the little boy said. "Then, why do you delete so much?" I have an issue with our second lesson today. Or, rather, not with the lesson, but with the fact that our lectionary has cut out several verses of the passage. Now, there have always been

In the Name... An angel appeared at a clergy meeting and announced that one of them, a venerable priest with a reputation for sanctity and good works, was to be rewarded with his choice of wealth, wisdom, or beauty. Without hesitation, the priest selected wisdom. "Done!" said the angel, and disappeared. All heads then turned toward the reverend patriarch who was obviously deep in thought. "Father", one of the young priests whispered, "What is it?" The old priest sighed an

In the Name… My brother-in-law once told me that a politician is someone who can predict the future and then explain why it didn’t happen. In the middle of the fourth century, there lived a young man by the name of Augustine. His mother, Monica was a devout Christian. His father was a not-devout pagan. Augustine was a bright lad and became a lawyer, but fell into a lifestyle of idleness, sex, and alcohol. He fathered a son with one of his girlfriends and dabbled in weird

In the Name… A Sunday School teacher was doing a lesson with her class and asked, "What does the Bible say about how we should treat our brothers and sisters?" and one child piped up, "Thou shalt not kill." Thomas Jefferson is best known as author of the Declaration of American Independence, the document which asserted the rights of a colonial people to be free of the rule of their king. What is perhaps less well known is that Jefferson also authored his own personal declara

Sermon: PENTECOST 12, September 1st, 2019 In the Name… There’s a story told about one of our past bishops who was noted for his dignity and bearing. Once, at a banquet, a waiter spilled hot soup on him. Closing his eyes, but, maintaining his composure, the bishop asked, “Would some layman please express my feelings?” It can come as a surprise for us to read that Jesus was occasionally a dinner guest at the homes of Pharisees. It’s a surprise because he was often critical o

In the Name... A Sunday school teacher was explaining Holy Communion to her class and observed that it was a joyful feast. “Joyful”, she said, “means ‘happy.’ And ‘feast’ means ‘meal.’” One little boy then said, “Well, if it’s a Happy Meal, why don’t we have a hamburger, fires and soft drink?” In the liturgy of the Church of England, after the congregation has received communion, the celebrant addresses the congregation with the words we heard read this morning from Hebrew

In the Name... I learned this week why insurance agents don't usually attend Pentecostal churches. They get too nervous when the pastor prays, "Lord, set this place on fire." Fire. The Old Testament is full of references to the God whose "wrath goes forth like fire", and whose “anger burns like fire". And there are some preachers and denominations which have gotten a reputation as being all about "fire and brimstone" because to them the idea of God being wrathful, God bein

In the Name... There was once a gang member who started going to a Pentecostal church and getting his life back together. After a while, he went to see the pastor with a problem, "Reverend", he said, "The gang says they'll kill me if I keep coming here." "Fear not, brother, have faith.” the pastor replied. "The Lord loveth a sinner come to judgment and He will send His mighty host of angels to protect you." "Wow!” the young man exclaimed, "That's awesome, 'cause they said

Sermon: PENTECOST 5, July 14th, 2019 In the Name… It’s always interesting cleaning up after services. You’d be surprised the things you find. Sometimes, pocket change has rolled out behind the pew cushions. Not a fortune, mind you, but enough to confuse the tellers who have to add, say, a few cents to what was a tidy whole dollar deposit. Sometimes, interesting artwork is left behind, gracing bulletins, visitor cards, or other loose paper surfaces. In one congregation, I

In the Name... The story is told of a Scottish minister visiting an art gallery in Italy. Seeing a painting of the Last Judgement depicting the souls of humans being pulled in a sort of tug of war between angels and demons he was asked what he thought of it. "Well," he said, "it looks like the devils have gravity on their side." This morning's Gospel presents us with the challenge of sharing a vision - the vision of the fall of Satan. The passage began with Jesus sending o

In the Name... A grumpy fellow once complained to a pastor, "I don't go to church because it's full of hypocrites." "That's not true,” the pastor replied, "We're not nearly full at all and I’m sure you’ll find a seat." Our lessons, this morning, share the common theme that there is a vast difference between the way human beings act and think and the way that God acts and thinks. Not so many years ago, we heard a lot about the various gaps in our society. The generation gap

In the Name… Two priests were on vacation at the beach, just strolling along the boardwalk dressed in usual beach attire – shorts, sandals, floppy hats - when a stunning young woman in a bikini passed by and said “Hello, Fathers.” Amazed, the priests stopped her and asked, “Excuse us, Miss. We are priests, but, dressed as we are, how did you know?” She replied, “Don’t you recognize me? I’m Sister Catherine from the school.” “Clothed and in his right mind.” That is how th

In the Name… A friend of mine had a church up in Washington State and one year his choir director found an anthem to use on Pentecost. Musically, it was quite good, but the original text had been written in German and part of the English translation was not acceptable to my friend. It went: “And there arose a mighty wind. Alleluia. Alleluia. It came from where they sat. Alleluia. Alleluia.” True story. But, can you imagine what it must have been like that first Pentecost

In the Name... A lion woke up one morning feeling a bit full of himself, so, he went out, cornered a hyena and roared, "Who is king of the animals?" The trembling hyena said, "You are, O mighty lion!" Later, the lion confronted an antelope and roared “Who is king of the animals?" The terrified antelope stammered, "Oh great lion, you are the king!" On a roll now, the lion swaggered up to an elephant and roared, "Who is king of the animals?" Without a word, the elephant sna

In the Name... A grizzled old man stood on a park bench and started shouting, "The world will end soon. The world will end soon." A young fellow passing by stopped and said, “You're a bit old-fashioned, my friend. You need to start a website, get on to social media and, every so often, predict an exact date. Then you’ll get a following. Nobody pays attention to generalizations.” Suddenly, a massive fire ball flashed down from the sky and smashed into the Earth, triggerin

In the Name... And Jesus said, "Beware of the scribes who like to walk around in long robes." I had thought of wearing a short one today. But, perhaps the proverb should be, beware of the priest who talks about the word "sacrifice" on the day when we're distributing pledge cards. What comes to mind when we hear the word "sacrifice"? Maybe some movie images of half-naked savages dancing around an altar with a belching volcano in the background. Or, we could think of the se

In the Name... Lake Wobegon is a quiet sort of place, but, you won't find it on any map because it's the creation of author Garrison Keillor and was the setting for his series on small-town life “Lake Wobegon Days.” In this series, we follow the adventures of a kid who shares his observations about being raised in this community. In religion, for example, he says he belongs to a small church which meets in his Uncle Al's living room. "In a town where everyone was either Lu

In the Name... There was once a British TV series set in a department store. The title of the series was the question sales staff would pose to browsing customers, "Are You Being Served?" It's always struck me that's really a strange question because obviously if a customer is wandering around they aren't being served. Much more sensible would be the question, "May I help you?" That's the sort of question we ask when someone we know has received some bad news or is in some

In the Name.... There was once a cat that died and went to Heaven. At the gates, St. Peter asked if the cat would like anything special. "Why, yes", the cat replied, "I'd like a nice soft cloud to stretch out on." "It's yours", said St. Peter. Later, a mouse died and went to Heaven. St. Peter asked if the mouse would like anything and he said that since all his life he'd scurried around he'd like a set of roller skates. "No problem", St. Peter replied. A few days later